food struggles

This last week and weekend I have eaten poorly. I will sadly admit it. I’m not proud of myself and I really don’t know what my deal is. I have tried to think of why I’m making such poor decisions and the only thing I can come up with is they whole “if they can eat like that then I can”, or “I want to eat because they are eating even though I’m not hungry.”

For example: Saturday we hosted our cousin-in-law’s 3^rd birthday at our house and even though I happily didn’t partake in ANY cake or ice cream I did eat 2 pancakes for breakfast and throughout the day I snacked on about 4 individual baggies of chips (about 150 calories a piece) and ate 3- 2’’ turkey sandwiches and about a handful or twoof random candy from the piñata. I am particular when it comes to my cake and I can’t stand whipped icing I’m more of a fondant kind of girl. And I’m not a fan of several different ice cream flavors in one container, I don’t know why but it just bothers me.

And Sunday I honestly was only hungry at breakfast but decided to consume most of the groceries in the kitchen out of sheer boredom and because the rest of the house was snacking all day and then dinner time came. I literally was not hungry AT ALL but do you want to know what I did?? I ate not one but TWO homemade whole wheat chicken quesadillas!!!! I am proud that I only ate a handful of chips with salsa and only allowed myself two tablespoons of sour cream but still I literally wasn’t hungry and decided to stuff my face anyways…..My head was saying, “No, Stop eating!!!” But my stomach was saying, “Not a chance!!”

And this week has been the same song and dance as this weekend. I go home on my lunch break so that I will make healthier food choices and even though most of the time I make good choices I overeat those “good choices”. I am going to have to do some major game planning on how to get rid of the next 30lbs. I am not buying anymore candy corn this year that’s for sure!

I seriously wish that the major food holidays would be split up more… like have Halloween in June,  Thanksgiving in September and keep Christmas where it is and leave the rest of the holidays where they are. It’s just so hard to keep my healthy lifestyle from fizzling with the holidays bouncing from one right to another. It would probably be better if I didn’t snack throughout the holiday months. It’s Halloween, then Thanksgiving, Christmas Eve at the in-laws, Christmas day dinner, my birthday in January because clearly it should be a national holiday, and then Valentines!  

I just have to keep telling myself that I did just fine last year that I can do just as great this year!